Better get Maaco
- Thread starter Texas Cop
- Start date
Greg
BoM October 2006
' The Air Force Accident Investigation concluded the pilots forgot to lower the landing gear. The USAF estimated the damage to the B-1B at $7.9 million, and the damage to the runway at $14,025. '
Taken from the maintanance log of this B1-B:
(not really, but appropriate ... especially the last one)
Problem: Something loose in cockpit.
Solution: Something tightened in cockpit.
Problem: Dead bugs on windshield.
Solution: Live bugs on backorder.
Problem: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
Solution: That's what they're there for!
Problem: IFF inoperative.
Solution: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
Problem: Suspected crack in windscreen.
Solution: Suspect you're right.
Problem: Aircraft handles funny.
Solution: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
Problem: Radar hums.
Solution: Reprogrammed radar with words.
Problem: Mouse in cockpit.
Solution: Cat installed.
Problem: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Solution: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
Problem: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
Solution: Evidence removed.
Problem: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
Solution: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.
(not really, but appropriate ... especially the last one)
Problem: Something loose in cockpit.
Solution: Something tightened in cockpit.
Problem: Dead bugs on windshield.
Solution: Live bugs on backorder.
Problem: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
Solution: That's what they're there for!
Problem: IFF inoperative.
Solution: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
Problem: Suspected crack in windscreen.
Solution: Suspect you're right.
Problem: Aircraft handles funny.
Solution: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
Problem: Radar hums.
Solution: Reprogrammed radar with words.
Problem: Mouse in cockpit.
Solution: Cat installed.
Problem: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Solution: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
Problem: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
Solution: Evidence removed.
Problem: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
Solution: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.