Favorite bad weather sayings

[AZsteelman]

OK, it's been raining all damn day, and it might have hit 50 degrees here..help me out with some cold rainy day words of wisdom...

- It's raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock

- It's colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra

Next?

 

[Greg]

It's colder than a welldiggers ass.
It's colder than a toilet seat in Siberia.

 

[Poni]

its a tit bit nippaly outside

 

[Greg]

Weather forecast for tonight: dark. ~George Carlin

 

[tedski]

It's fricking cold.

 

[AZsteelman]

Ok, to make this interesting...my wife is the judge. Winner gets bombed! Now, carry on...

 

[Black Dog]

It's so cold that folks are going to church just to hear about the fires of hell.

 

[Black Dog]

Hotter than a 2 dollar pistol. (edit: oops, this isn't a cold one)

 

[Greg]

It's colder than a dead beaver's dick

 

[tedski]

How cold it's it outside? It's so cold that ...

... we had to chisel the dog off a fire-hydrant

... local pet stores are selling penguins

... the local flasher was caught *describing* himself to women

... you light a candle and the flame freezes

... you have to break the smoke off your chimney

... you have to open the fridge to heat the house

... after police told a robber to freeze - he did

... that Bill Clinton is sleeping with his own wife in order to keep warm

... the Statue of Liberty put the torch inside her dress

... local lawyers had their hands in their own pockets

... people are looking forward to getting a fever

... mailmen are now watching out for polar bears

... you can bake a cake, set it out to cool and 5 minutes later it's frosted

... local prisoners were begging for the electric chair

... my testicles have became ovaries.

... you'd have to jump start a reindeer

... Richard Simmons has been seen wearing full length pants

 

[Greg]

:rofl:

 

[CWS]

How cold it's it outside? It's so cold that ...

... we had to chisel the dog off a fire-hydrant

... local pet stores are selling penguins

... the local flasher was caught *describing* himself to women

... you light a candle and the flame freezes

... you have to break the smoke off your chimney

... you have to open the fridge to heat the house

... after police told a robber to freeze - he did

... that Bill Clinton is sleeping with his own wife in order to keep warm

... the Statue of Liberty put the torch inside her dress

... local lawyers had their hands in their own pockets

... people are looking forward to getting a fever

... mailmen are now watching out for polar bears

... you can bake a cake, set it out to cool and 5 minutes later it's frosted

... local prisoners were begging for the electric chair

... my testicles have became ovaries.

... you'd have to jump start a reindeer



... Richard Simmons has been seen wearing full length pants

How can anyone compete with that!!!!

 

[TBaGZ]

Snow = White Gold!!!!!!!!!!

Well it used to... I guess I won't be plowing too much when I get to Florida next month.. O well, good trade off to me!!!!!

 

[Rank_Tyro]

It's beautiful.

Rain, fog, cold...

The only problem is, my cigar keeps going out.

 

[MichiganM]

When I was a little kid I used to think God was crying when it rained.

 

[cvm4]

It's raining cats & dogs :hysterica

 

[geoffrie]

So cold, it's a Three Dog Night

 

[tripp]

How can anyone compete with that!!!!

I agree!!! Thanks for the laughs Tedski

 

[AZsteelman]

It's so cold that folks are going to church just to hear about the fires of hell.

OK it's official...

3rd place for originality!

Nice one, very funny...my wife really liked this one~

 

[AZsteelman]

How cold it's it outside? It's so cold that ...

... we had to chisel the dog off a fire-hydrant

... local pet stores are selling penguins

... the local flasher was caught *describing* himself to women

... you light a candle and the flame freezes

... you have to break the smoke off your chimney

... you have to open the fridge to heat the house

... after police told a robber to freeze - he did

... that Bill Clinton is sleeping with his own wife in order to keep warm

... the Statue of Liberty put the torch inside her dress

... local lawyers had their hands in their own pockets

... people are looking forward to getting a fever

... mailmen are now watching out for polar bears

... you can bake a cake, set it out to cool and 5 minutes later it's frosted

... local prisoners were begging for the electric chair

... my testicles have became ovaries.

... you'd have to jump start a reindeer

... Richard Simmons has been seen wearing full length pants

2nd place for effort - very nice, but you got beat by...