In my younger days while just getting clean, I was cruising up to a stoplight on Route 1. Was a beautiful Saturday afternoon. Ahead of me a Maryland State trooper was stopped at red light going in my direction. I can see the side street light just turn yellow. So instead of slowing down as I am fast approaching, I punch my 1985 Ford Escort and hit the white line at the intersection right when the light turned green doing 60 in a 45 zone. I basically blew the doors off that trooper, laughing my ass off as I see him in my rear view along with my exhaust fumes.
Only thing is, I am in the Escort with a POS 4 banger and he is the large cop cruiser with a souped up 8 banger. Not to mention 1/4 mile down the road, I catch the next light red. UH-OH I think to myself. Well guess who quietly pulls up right behind me? I look in the rear view and see him already on the CB, running my plates for sure. Another 30 seconds, I see him take out his large police hat, the large ones you see the Canadians wear. He puts it on his head, cinches it down and readies for the light to turn. By now, my heart is pounding and I feel sweat starting to form on my brow.
30 more seconds pass (sure felt longer) and we get a green light so I start to go. I get half way through the light, and he blasts the sirens and lights up the bubble gum machine on the roof. So to the shoulder I go using my turn signal being proper and all. He tells me to exit the car, shakes me down good, and puts cuffs on me. He proceeds to tell me I was driving recklessly at the previous light. Tells me I was speeding. Also tells me I am driving on a suspended license that MD revoked cause of a failure to appear on a previous charge in DC.
Long and short, he treated me bad and I never was a bigger asshole to a cop in my life (and never will be). He tried to take to the courthouse to see a judge to make me sit in jail over the weekend as he knows on Saturday, the court closed early. He just missed the judge who comes in for the half a day and even tried to get the on call judge to lock me up. The judge refused to come in cause he was at a great party. So the cop offered me two choices: He could call his superiors at the barracks and demand the judge come in. The would guarantee me at least 2 days in jail, Saturday and Sunday. Probably more as I would have pissed that judge off real good. OR I could sign all the tickets he wrote and make my own way 10 miles back to my car on the side of the road. I could not sign those tickets fast enough. As he starts to drive away, I give him a few more curses. He just laughed as he sped away, knowing I was stranded. I do not think I have had a ticket since then.
I have been pulled over twice. Luckily both times was going home from the fire station and I was wearing my uniform. Both times the cops cut me loose.
eace:
