New fathers
- Thread starter Agentskull
- Start date
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2014
- Messages
- 453
I'll jump in here. Got a 7 year old girl and a 2 year old boy. They're both nightmares every day, but I love both to death. Got a question? I've probably got an opinion. Get a bodily fluid on you? Comes with the territory. I'll still commiserate, though...
Seriously, having kids is insane, amazing, horrible and rewarding all at the same time. Just always remember, if you want to strangle them, it just means you love them (as long as you don't actually do it) and it's your punishment for what you did to your parents. What goes around comes around. Twice.
Seriously, having kids is insane, amazing, horrible and rewarding all at the same time. Just always remember, if you want to strangle them, it just means you love them (as long as you don't actually do it) and it's your punishment for what you did to your parents. What goes around comes around. Twice.
My situation is a little different. When I married my wife she had three kids of here own. I had none. I went from 0 to 3 in a heartbeat. They were 5, 6, 7 when i first met them. Four years later and i haven't choked anyone. ... at least not until dead.
I feel blessed to be in this situation, even though the task is daunting and the path unclear. We will enjoy the journey....
Not so new Dad here, subscribed. Great idea OP.
I feel blessed to be in this situation, even though the task is daunting and the path unclear. We will enjoy the journey....
Not so new Dad here, subscribed. Great idea OP.
herfdog
I am no rocket surgeon
Makes you realize how bad you were as a kid and how great your parents were. It gives perspective.
I've got 2 daughters....Grace is 8 and Erin is 4 and I love them more than life itself which makes being their father so difficult sometimes. What I mean is I believe we often try so hard to do the right thing but also make them happy that when you combine it with lack of sleep and other day to day stress like work, etc. that it's a small miracle we don't implode completely...lol. I have a healthy respect now for what my parents went through...lol. It really dawns on you just how quickly your life changes sometimes. In a matter of a few short years I got engaged, finished school, took my first real full-time job, bought a house, got married and then Gracie was born. I distinctly remember the first evening home from the hospital after she was born.....all the visitors had finally left and my wife had gone to lay down for a nap and I was sitting in my recliner with my newborn sleeping quietly in my arms....and just at that moment it sort of hit me.......Holy Shit......this is for real.....this is happening....I have created a new life and she is completely dependent upon me for EVERYTHING! It was a little sobering, slightly exhilarating and completely terrifying all at once....LOL. Nothing I or any other father can say will prepare you for the experience of becoming a father for the first time. To say it is the greatest challenge you will ever face is a bit of an understatement. It will also bring you a level of joy, pride and happiness that you never knew existed. In many ways it forces us each in our own way to look at ourselves in a new light and to be very aware of our own faults and flaws for fear of either passing them on to our own children or otherwise damaging them in some way. It challenges us to be better men and to set a good example for them. Don't be afraid of this challenge.....embrace it and wake up every morning determined to learn from the mistakes you made yesterday and be the best father you can be today. At the same time....don't be too hard on yourself....kids are pretty resilient and will forgive you for a lot as long as they know you love them. 
StogieNinja
Derek | BoM June 2014
Get down on the floor and play with them. It's monotonous, you'll find a million excuses not to... but get down on the floor and play dolls/legos/gijoes/whatever with them, the way they want to play.
Even if they tell you Vader can't force-choke people. Even if Hulk Is the most powerful avenger and Black Widow wouldn't be able to beat him in a fight. Let 'em imagine the world as they want to when you play. It's your world for everything else in life, let them play in their world... and play in it with them.
Even if they tell you Vader can't force-choke people. Even if Hulk Is the most powerful avenger and Black Widow wouldn't be able to beat him in a fight. Let 'em imagine the world as they want to when you play. It's your world for everything else in life, let them play in their world... and play in it with them.
X10000000000I've got 2 daughters....Grace is 8 and Erin is 4 and I love them more than life itself which makes being their father so difficult sometimes. What I mean is I believe we often try so hard to do the right thing but also make them happy that when you combine it with lack of sleep and other day to day stress like work, etc. that it's a small miracle we don't implode completely...lol. I have a healthy respect now for what my parents went through...lol. It really dawns on you just how quickly your life changes sometimes. In a matter of a few short years I got engaged, finished school, took my first real full-time job, bought a house, got married and then Gracie was born. I distinctly remember the first evening home from the hospital after she was born.....all the visitors had finally left and my wife had gone to lay down for a nap and I was sitting in my recliner with my newborn sleeping quietly in my arms....and just at that moment it sort of hit me.......Holy Shit......this is for real.....this is happening....I have created a new life and she is completely dependent upon me for EVERYTHING! It was a little sobering, slightly exhilarating and completely terrifying all at once....LOL. Nothing I or any other father can say will prepare you for the experience of becoming a father for the first time. To say it is the greatest challenge you will ever face is a bit of an understatement. It will also bring you a level of joy, pride and happiness that you never knew existed. In many ways it forces us each in our own way to look at ourselves in a new light and to be very aware of our own faults and flaws for fear of either passing them on to our own children or otherwise damaging them in some way. It challenges us to be better men and to set a good example for them. Don't be afraid of this challenge.....embrace it and wake up every morning determined to learn from the mistakes you made yesterday and be the best father you can be today. At the same time....don't be too hard on yourself....kids are pretty resilient and will forgive you for a lot as long as they know you love them.
Dads how to you find time to enjoy cigars. I can usually only get in two a week. Friday and sat night. Otherwise between work, kids activities, homework, dinner, household chores etc... etc... I just cant make the time.
I also have chosen not to smoke in front of my kids which also limits my available smoking time.
I also have chosen not to smoke in front of my kids which also limits my available smoking time.
Bed time is 8pm. Cigar time is 8:30 til..?
If I have to work late, I can take it to my back patio and smoke then. (This is the norm, lately). I also teach night classes at a JC 50 minutes from the house... the truck gets smoked in sometimes, too...
AlohaStyle
BoM Sept '12 & Aug '13
Yep, grab the cigar after kids bedtime.
cgraunke
BoM March '14
Same here. I get 15-20 minutes of pipe time driving to work. I think I've had one (maybe two?) cigars since the twins were born this past September.
Parents don't forget to take some time for yourselves and/or you and your wife. This is something my wife and I have not done enough of. Get that babysitter every now and again. Get the grandparents to watch them for a weekend so you can take a weekend trip with the wife. I regret not having done this enough. I love my kids, but they also drive me crazy and sometimes you have to get away. Even just some normal adult conversation can be nice now and again.
I have a pic somewhere holding my second sippin a 40. He's got his bottle I've got mine. Candidate shmandidate ...love your children and be there for them no matter what including, if the situation ever warrants it, in spite of what may occur or be occurring between you and the mother. Love and be there for the child don't project the situation onto them. So many parents make that mistake.
cgraunke
BoM March '14
I'm way past due here... need to remedy that. Mama needs attention, too!