Altercall
I beat you all May '08 :)
OK, so I wrote this big draw out response the other night, and then accidentally went to another web page and lost it. So, here's a brief version...
From one teacher's perspective...
Most students do not apply themselves the best they can! In fact, I would say that the majority of students don't really try that hard when it comes to school. I was the exact same way when I went through school. I took notes, but never really did much at home. I didn't always pay much attention in class, and some I slept alot in. In college I didn't go to alot of my classes since it wasn't required, and in one that was required attendance I should have lost credit for it, but talked my way into getting it. It wasn't until a girlfriend of mine told me I HAD to go to class every day that I actually did. I transferred to Texas Tech University and graduated with a 3.95.
I think most of my academic history is similar to most students in some way. They do what they think is expected of them They put only as much effort as they think is required to get what they want, which could be a grade, acceptance from the teacher/parents, acceptance from students, or the feeling of accomplishment. We have lowered our standards in classrooms for students in most major metropolitan areas. In more rural areas that might not be the case, but it is for the larger metro areas. The simple fact is, our kids are doing less, so we expect less. When we expect less they in turn give less. I don't know how many teachers I know that will not give homework because the students will not bring it back. And it's true. There are times when I give homework that less than 35% of a class will have it done. Most times the students my students are finishing their work for me in other teachers' classes, and I've caught alot trying to do the same in my class. The problem, they do it when they should be learning something else, and now they're behind in the other subject. It's just the mindset that has become so prevalent, and I don't where it started or how to combat it, that we just have to get this done as long as it doesn't cost me any of my time.
I remember back in school trying to do all my work in school, before classes, or after I finished other work, but I don't ever remember trying to do it while a teacher was teaching. We just knew it was wrong and we'd get in trouble. Did I finish everything, no, but not finishing to me was better than getting in trouble for it. That brings me to your situation...
I think the biggest tell in your situation is the note from the teacher about his behavior. The teachers I know don't just throw that out there. In fact, most notes like that are understated. I'm not going to tell a parent there kid is talking with friends if they're just doing it every once in awhile because, heck, kids are kids. I'm going to save that for the kids that I continually have to redirect. I'm also not going to tell the parents, at first, how bad it is. The reason, I don't know how the parent is going to react. You have to realize that some parents will believe anything their kids tell them if they day it long enough. I've had several students transferred into my class because a parent complains about a teacher "picking on" their child. Does it happen? Occasionally, but usually not when the parents complain about it. I want to see how parents respond to a small problem before I risk those parents going over my head.
I also want to give the kids a chance to fix it on their own. I'd rather understate it and have the kids fix it from a nudge than risk losing a kid in the classroom because he/she got their butts beat at home. Now if it doesn't change, I'll have no problems with that.
With your son, I would say to make a big deal about the behavior stuff. If you can stand your ground early on that you stand a better chance of getting him on track. If he's paying attention he's immeasurably more likely to to be working harder.
Secondly, I would say you can work him harder without feeling like you're pushing him too hard. That takes a different form for each student, though. Some kids are motivated by praise alone, some by rewards, some by punishment, and some are only internally motivated. Don't be afraid to use any of the tools at your disposal to help him reach his highest potential. He doesn't have to give up the rest of his life to do well academically, but if we all think back to our own school days most of us would agree that we could have put a whole lot more work in without it really effecting us in any way. I know it wouldn't have hurt me to pay attention in class or miss 30-45 minutes a night of not watching TV, playing computer games, or whatever I was doing.
From one teacher's perspective...
Most students do not apply themselves the best they can! In fact, I would say that the majority of students don't really try that hard when it comes to school. I was the exact same way when I went through school. I took notes, but never really did much at home. I didn't always pay much attention in class, and some I slept alot in. In college I didn't go to alot of my classes since it wasn't required, and in one that was required attendance I should have lost credit for it, but talked my way into getting it. It wasn't until a girlfriend of mine told me I HAD to go to class every day that I actually did. I transferred to Texas Tech University and graduated with a 3.95.
I think most of my academic history is similar to most students in some way. They do what they think is expected of them They put only as much effort as they think is required to get what they want, which could be a grade, acceptance from the teacher/parents, acceptance from students, or the feeling of accomplishment. We have lowered our standards in classrooms for students in most major metropolitan areas. In more rural areas that might not be the case, but it is for the larger metro areas. The simple fact is, our kids are doing less, so we expect less. When we expect less they in turn give less. I don't know how many teachers I know that will not give homework because the students will not bring it back. And it's true. There are times when I give homework that less than 35% of a class will have it done. Most times the students my students are finishing their work for me in other teachers' classes, and I've caught alot trying to do the same in my class. The problem, they do it when they should be learning something else, and now they're behind in the other subject. It's just the mindset that has become so prevalent, and I don't where it started or how to combat it, that we just have to get this done as long as it doesn't cost me any of my time.
I remember back in school trying to do all my work in school, before classes, or after I finished other work, but I don't ever remember trying to do it while a teacher was teaching. We just knew it was wrong and we'd get in trouble. Did I finish everything, no, but not finishing to me was better than getting in trouble for it. That brings me to your situation...
I think the biggest tell in your situation is the note from the teacher about his behavior. The teachers I know don't just throw that out there. In fact, most notes like that are understated. I'm not going to tell a parent there kid is talking with friends if they're just doing it every once in awhile because, heck, kids are kids. I'm going to save that for the kids that I continually have to redirect. I'm also not going to tell the parents, at first, how bad it is. The reason, I don't know how the parent is going to react. You have to realize that some parents will believe anything their kids tell them if they day it long enough. I've had several students transferred into my class because a parent complains about a teacher "picking on" their child. Does it happen? Occasionally, but usually not when the parents complain about it. I want to see how parents respond to a small problem before I risk those parents going over my head.
I also want to give the kids a chance to fix it on their own. I'd rather understate it and have the kids fix it from a nudge than risk losing a kid in the classroom because he/she got their butts beat at home. Now if it doesn't change, I'll have no problems with that.
With your son, I would say to make a big deal about the behavior stuff. If you can stand your ground early on that you stand a better chance of getting him on track. If he's paying attention he's immeasurably more likely to to be working harder.
Secondly, I would say you can work him harder without feeling like you're pushing him too hard. That takes a different form for each student, though. Some kids are motivated by praise alone, some by rewards, some by punishment, and some are only internally motivated. Don't be afraid to use any of the tools at your disposal to help him reach his highest potential. He doesn't have to give up the rest of his life to do well academically, but if we all think back to our own school days most of us would agree that we could have put a whole lot more work in without it really effecting us in any way. I know it wouldn't have hurt me to pay attention in class or miss 30-45 minutes a night of not watching TV, playing computer games, or whatever I was doing.