I really feel for you Cowboy. I am a HUGE dog lover myself, and have always had dogs. My parents live in town and I take every opportunity I have to go see my dogs (/their dogs) and hang out with them. I see them every couple of days, and it always warms my heart how they act like I've been gone for an eternity when I open the door. Few things are as awesome as a dog who is stoked to see you, wagging, dancing around, ready to play.
I lost a long time companion of mine, a 14 year old Pembroke Corgi, named Murphy, about a year ago. It was horrible, but she was suffering, and it was for the best that we let her go. I know she will be waiting around for my to throw her a tennis ball again in the future, along with all of the other dogs I've had in my lifetime. It sucks, but I promise, getting a puppy will help. They are a handful, and will keep you occupied, and also, developing that bond with an animal again is an amazing thing. Keeping you in my thoughts cowboy. Much love for dog lovers.