Im going to preface this by saying that my main reason for smoking cigars is because I work 70 to 80 hours a week and that is a way for me to unwind and relax. Now I don't know how many of y'all have kids or have empty nests so here's what I got. My middle son (15) just informed me that my oldest son (16) was smoking cigars (black and milds) with my neighbors sons. So needless to say I'm in a spot where really I have no right to say you don't need to be smoking cuz I smoke cigars (about 1 a week). So my question is what would y'all do besides the obvious of handing him a Padron and tell him not to be smoking that crap ever again and don't let your mama find out! Haha just kid'n. seriously I'm just kid'n. Now what would you do? Thanx
Question for y'all
- Thread starter Madcox
- Start date
StogieNinja
Derek | BoM June 2014
It's a complex question with a complex answer. A lot of it depends on what kind of kid he is. If he's a rebel, he's going to do what he's going to do, steering him towards better quality and teaching use in moderation might be the most beneficial. Alternately, he might just need some good stern parenting and instruction. It all depends. Either way, there should be a conversation about substance abuse, as well as the difference between "using" nicotine, and the enjoyment of a fine cigar once a week.
What kind of marriage you have, how you two communicate, and his relationship with your wife will also have some bearing on your decision on how to proceed. Is she likely to support whatever decision you make, or is she likely to be against you encouraging any kind of smoking at all? The last thing a kid who is rebelling needs is divided parents, but if he's a good kid then teaching him moderation is really a valuable thing... if your wife supports it. If he's a rebellious kid, you and your wife need to be 100% unified.
Again, lots of options depending your your family situation, but I would talk it over with your wife. Come to a mutual agreement and present it to your kid.
Personally I'd explain to my wife my desire to teach my son how to enjoy life's pleasures properly, within bounds, and using self control, and then together with your wife (i don't mean it needs to be a "family meeting" or anything, just that you two should be in agreement) let your son know you are willing to let him enjoy the finer things in life, provided he does them only with you, and only in a responsible way and that there will be consequences for violating those rules. If done properly you could not only help teach your kid some valuable life lessons, but also gain a new avenue to build relationship with him.
What kind of marriage you have, how you two communicate, and his relationship with your wife will also have some bearing on your decision on how to proceed. Is she likely to support whatever decision you make, or is she likely to be against you encouraging any kind of smoking at all? The last thing a kid who is rebelling needs is divided parents, but if he's a good kid then teaching him moderation is really a valuable thing... if your wife supports it. If he's a rebellious kid, you and your wife need to be 100% unified.
Again, lots of options depending your your family situation, but I would talk it over with your wife. Come to a mutual agreement and present it to your kid.
Personally I'd explain to my wife my desire to teach my son how to enjoy life's pleasures properly, within bounds, and using self control, and then together with your wife (i don't mean it needs to be a "family meeting" or anything, just that you two should be in agreement) let your son know you are willing to let him enjoy the finer things in life, provided he does them only with you, and only in a responsible way and that there will be consequences for violating those rules. If done properly you could not only help teach your kid some valuable life lessons, but also gain a new avenue to build relationship with him.
very touchy subject here, i started smokeing when i was 12, and when i was about 14 or 15 me and my now brother in law got into some really strong cigars it was and to this day is the only time i seen someone turn green and get sick!!!!
so idk here i think i would find the fullest full cigar i could and have him smoke that while having a talk with him try to make sure he is on an empty stomach and see if you can't get him to get a little Nicoten sickness from it,,,,
To this day my brother in law has never ever tryed to smoke anything else
so idk here i think i would find the fullest full cigar i could and have him smoke that while having a talk with him try to make sure he is on an empty stomach and see if you can't get him to get a little Nicoten sickness from it,,,,
To this day my brother in law has never ever tryed to smoke anything else
ChefBoyRG54
BoM Sept '14 & BoY 2014
That should do it. Lol
In seriousness it is an impossible question to answer without knowing you're entire dynamic. I'm sure one day my daughter or son will challenge me with the same issue. Good luck
Good ideas Stogie Ninja! He is a Great kid and not a rebel at all. I think he did it to fit in with my neighbors kids. I did have a talk with him and explained to him why I smoke and explained that he didn't have to smoke to fit in and be cool. I started smoking cigarettes at 15 so I know all about trying to fit in. My wife and I have a good relationship but here recently I believe she is perimenapausal and her hormones are crazy so there is no talking to her about this cuz she would flip!!
Hahaha I'm for that!!! Haha he wouldn't want anymore cigars! But I did tell him when he was grown I think it would be cool to sit down and enjoy a cigar with my son. I go to my pops house now and sit and smoke with him and I love it. So I don't want to completely ruin him on cigars! Although it is a great idea!
I don't speak with my blood father or mother. Due to years of abuse and stuff. But my favorite moment of all was when I went home for leave and hung out with my "replacement" dad and shared scotch and cigars and he told me he was proud of me.Hahaha I'm for that!!! Haha he wouldn't want anymore cigars! But I did tell him when he was grown I think it would be cool to sit down and enjoy a cigar with my son. I go to my pops house now and sit and smoke with him and I love it. So I don't want to completely ruin him on cigars! Although it is a great idea!
That is an amazing moment for both father and son. So I wouldn't shove the MUWAT down his throat just yet. But maybe a acid. Show him the beauty of a real cigar.
I got you some cigars going out in the morning
