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Let's Talk, BOTL and mental health

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Adam that is rough my good sir that is rough. From the looks of it you have a solid heart and soul brother. We all have into the darkness and it takes a lot to find the way out but you have found your way out. If this is the woman that means the world to you and I don't mean that in any other way then your one and everything then don't let her go. Show her, talk to her and share everything inside and out. It will get better my friend I promise. No matter the path it will get better. If you ever need anything like everyone has said we are here for you.
 
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Thank you everyone for all your support and advice. Its really comforting know that other's have been through the same things and come out with great results. Very reassuming indeed.
make sure you show no resentment toward her during this week and a half time period and also make sure she knows that you know why you split.
Thanks for that comment. Im feeling very betrayed and angry to go along with the rest and this is hard to do but I see the value. What does snapping at her achieve? or a smartass comment? Makes me feel better for 1/2 a second then nothing but more pain. I think about this all the time. We still talk heaps due to our son so this is always in the back of my mind.

Thanks again everyone a very big help.
 
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A bump for the cause. I am stressed out over school and wedding stuff so I thought I would be as good a person as any to push it to the top.

I've been sick for 3 days now and can't breath which just drives me up the wall.
 

3/5King

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A bump for the cause. I am stressed out over school and wedding stuff so I thought I would be as good a person as any to push it to the top.

I've been sick for 3 days now and can't breath which just drives me up the wall.
To give yourself instant relief (and natural) put a dab of hot sauce on the tongue or a light dusting of cayenne powder. This is a god send for me...I was just sick myself, a week ago. As for school and your wedding, take a step back and make mental notes of all the reasons you're doing what you're doing.. Stress is an illusion you manifest.... One you "get" this, you can realize that any state of mind is yours to manifest at anytime.. So manifest happiness and start enjoying the challenges in your life because they shape who you are and make life worth living. Take a few deep breaths buddy (after you eat some hot sauce and can..lol) you're doin' fine!
 
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Good bump. Definitely need this. Will be over 50 hours of work this week after tomorrow. Holy crap I hate Tax Season.
 

Ducttapegonewild

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To give yourself instant relief (and natural) put a dab of hot sauce on the tongue or a light dusting of cayenne powder. This is a god send for me...I was just sick myself, a week ago.
Found some interesting information, THIS DOES NOT WORK WITH GHOST PEPPER HOT SAUCE!!!

Also, not good for an infected throat...
 

Ducttapegonewild

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Okay, time for me to share.

Hello, my name is Matthew, and I suffer from severe depression. Not the kind of depression that makes you feel bad about shit going on, but the type that makes me not get out of bed for, sometimes, days at a time. I am better now, with the help of medication, but still have my moments. I tend to deflect shit with humor, see previous post, but, I do understand the gravity of this situation. I can pass on this small bit of advice to everyone here, take time, look at everyone around you, and ask them, "Are you okay?" Because those three words can, and sometimes are, the difference between life and death. As for me, I am fortunate in that I have never been the suicidal type depressant, but someone you know may, and all it takes are those three little words. Again, this is also directed towards people off of the boards as well as those here.

Take care of each yourself, you're the only one we have...
 
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H3rrington, if you're still watching the thread maybe I can give some empathy.
I did 5 1/2 years of a six year stint before an honorable under general discharge. I had two article 15th and did a total of 135 days extra duty. I lost E4 twice. You can imagine how much I loved it. I was stationed at Hurlburt Field. Spec Ops just loves a troublemaker. Once you're under that microscope, it's hell even if you get out from under it. Enduring this was the hardest thing I've had to do yet.
I joined at 19 to provide a better life for my wife and son. I got the divorce papers a week after I got to tech school. She brought her new boyfriend to the hearing. I had no reason to think of it as anything other than horrible. I turned into an alcoholic. Went through rehab and got booted a month later.
However, I met some amazing friends. One of them is my neighbor today. One of them lives in Oregon and makes custom knives or of titanium. I love these guys. They saw me through it all and are still there whenever I need them.
I would not be as strong today if I wasn't put through the fire and hardened. It hurt like nothing else, but> Thank God I learned to deal with that crap. It makes working in the civilian world a BREEZE. It makes EVERY DAY great because I know that I survived it. I know how strong I am.

If a pansy like me can make it through, you can too! You can do it and be stronger and better for it. And on your lady day, when you don't ever have to go back, you can burn a set of bdu's in effigy and save a set to prove that you've been through the fire and came out tougher and better than you went in.
 

bdc30

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Been a while since this thread has popped up. Bumping on the evening one of the finest actors/comedians of our generation has apparently committed suicide. RIP Mr. Robin Williams.
 
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Great bump. Unfortunate circumstances. If anyone on BOTL ever and I mean EVER needs to talk about anything, please contact me. I'm not good at much, but I feel like I'm a pretty good listener. Let's hope we never hear of one of our brothers in these circumstances.
 
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Yeah, very sad. Not sure if had started using/drinking again, but I don't know many alcoholics/addicts have not battled the same thoughts. Myself included.
 
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Been a while since this thread has popped up. Bumping on the evening one of the finest actors/comedians of our generation has apparently committed suicide. RIP Mr. Robin Williams.
+1 to the thread bump. Look out for those around you. Know the signs of depression, help your friends, and help yourself.
 

Angry Bill

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I'm here if anyone needs a friend too talk with. Please do not take the quick way out of your problems. Mental illness, depression and suicide are issues affecting so many. Stay focused and positive and talk with someone before you act.
 
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This is almost surreal, the Robin Williams death. I haven't been active on the forums for a few weeks, mainly because last month on of my direct reports at our communications center took his own life, and then a lovely young woman from another stationhouse who was an EMS provider, who we interacted with alot, did the same a few weeks later. It has been a tough few weeks for my people, and I've spent many hours talking with them about these events. There are people and groups out there for people to talk to, all you have to do is ask. But sometimes people just can't take that step. 800-273-TALK is a confidential number you can call 24/7. It's never too late to pick up the phone, or reach out to a friend or family member.
 
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javajunkie

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so... anyone have any advice for mentoring someone concerning substance issues? god knows i have my own poroblems, but i have had a couple few opportunities to reach out to others. if someone is currently doing this, or especially if they have for a while, i would love some pointers. in thread or PM, your call, if you think others could benefit from it.

FWIW i am NOT a twelve stepper, just because i have always been kinda against the grain. it's just my personality. it won't work for everyone, i know, but it has for me so far, god willing. still, i have never had issue with lending a shoulder, or a rock in the storm...
 

ChefBoyRG54

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so... anyone have any advice for mentoring someone concerning substance issues? god knows i have my own poroblems, but i have had a couple few opportunities to reach out to others. if someone is currently doing this, or especially if they have for a while, i would love some pointers. in thread or PM, your call, if you think others could benefit from it.

FWIW i am NOT a twelve stepper, just because i have always been kinda against the grain. it's just my personality. it won't work for everyone, i know, but it has for me so far, god willing. still, i have never had issue with lending a shoulder, or a rock in the storm...
Lend the shoulder, don't try to carry them.

If they want to change then they will be willing to do what's necessary. If not, then it's sad but nothing you can do.

I am a twelve step guy so my recommendation is that you should always be nudging them towards rehab or meetings to get started on the path.

No matter what, ones persons help is never enough for an addict(no knock to you Sean). Kind of the "it's takes a village" mentality!

I'm more than willing to talk by phone or pm further if you wish.
 
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What Chef said. Be prepared for the day they want to help themselves then be there with a nudge in the right direction. Offer to go to a meeting with them.
 
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