Need some help guys (husbands and fathers especially)

[luckysaturn13]

Just remember she's not herself and it'll all be ok n a year. Don't expect her to get excited over anything you do. Don't take it personal. Don't use commOn since to try to reason with her it'll never work. Don't waste the last of your cash to try to pamper her. Try to do something meaningful instead. Give her lots of massages.Don't be afraid to go outside and smoke of arguments get heated but I d stay close iwouldn't use that as an excuse to leave for 4 hrs. Check out my thread for new fathers nice pregnancy creme at huge discounts. Just remember no matter how crazy it gets ya love each other it'll b over soon and second ones a lot easier

 

[StogieNinja]

Just remember she's not herself and it'll all be ok n a year.

This. There's a major difference between a woman who's cranky all the time, and a woman who is suffering from a hormonal imbalance. Pregnancy can do weird things, and so can the postpartum stage, be prepared for that as well. It doesn't always bounce back right away.

I know women who have suffered severe depression and anxiety either during or after pregnancy due to chemical imbalances in the brain caused by all the extra hormones and whatnot. As others have said, it's important just to be as understanding as possible. Occasionally you'll need to stand your ground, but generally speaking all that's really needed or wanted is a shoulder to cry on and a husband who loves her regardless of how crazy she's gotten.

I wouldn't worry about spending a lot of money on her, just be there for her, even when she lashes out at you. Don't take it personally, and don't be offended. Just be patient, loving, and help her get through it, and it'll get better. If it doesn't, seek professional help, she may need counseling or even medication (I'm pretty anti-medication, but when it comes to mental health, I think it's sometimes necessary) to help balance her for a little while.

 

[Angry Bill]

My advice would be the complete opposite of all the advice given so far. So, I'll not comment.

Yeah Joel, You would move into the garage and avoid her till after the baby was born, lol. Jk bro.

 

[luckysaturn13]

Also if she wants to eat a certain food or restaurant don't try to go somewhere else or change her mind this will always end BADLY

 

[rraming]

Mine always likes to get a card stating how much I love her in someone else's words - ha! She also had silly little cravings of things she liked to eat and I would bring them home. One time when she was pregnant she had to have a Chicken sandwich from BK, she hates those places but she ate a lot of them for like 6 months - crazy stuff.

 

[D Quintero]

easy peasy .. give her the cash - and make clear its your last $40 , this oughtta give the illusion that you're completely vulnerable and left but to this simple measure of desperation.

 

[Mr.Draned]

I knew things were getting a bit crazy when I started to feel like going to work (I'm a teacher) was a nice break!
Good to hear it pans out in the end though. You guys are really making me feel a whole lot better!
Now, if only we could all hang out, smoke a cigar, and discuss all of this in person.

 

[Angry Bill]

we are talking about it in person, I'm enjoying a JH Shot by the pool at home, lol,

 

[Mr.Draned]

we are talking about it in person, I'm enjoying a JH Shot by the pool at home, lol,

Hahaha, and I'm sitting here on lunch, looking out the window and wishing I was by a pool with a JH Shot!

 

[Angry Bill]

Come on out brother. I'm retired so life is good. Trust me, your life is about to change for the better.

 

[Hoshneer]

My advice is that you don't need to spend money. Hell get some paper and draw her a cute card and tell her how much you love her. Anything hand crafted shows you spent the time to make it meaningful. The cornier the better IMO. If you want to spend a little money go to a pottery place or a craft shop and paint something or make something that symbolizes your marriage or just how much you adore her. This is something I love to do for my wife once in awhile.

 

[Mikenice81]

Ok guys, here goes.
My wife is pregnant, which is awesome! What isn't so awesome is how irritable she has become.
Misunderstand one statement, nuclear blast.
Had a long day at work, nuclear blast.
Want to go to bed because I'm tired, nuclear blast.
You guys who have done this before know what I mean.
I love the woman with all my heart, and that is why I'm asking for some guidance.
I have about $40 left to my name until payday (then bills come, so I'll be broke), and instead of buying any cigars I want to do something that will make her feel important.
I've done flowers, chocolate and all that, so something different.
So gentleman who have been here, what can I do to make her feel like her world isn't ending and that she is the most important person to me?
Let's keep it realistic too. Remember, I don't have much money!
Thanks in advance, you guys are great.

See if there is a place near by that does chair massages and get her a fifteen minute massage. While she is gone do something like the laundry or dishes. Better yet, both.

 

[sofc]

I haven't had the same experience but I kind of agree with hoshy. No need to spend money, find a way that tells her that you love her and are looking forward to being with her the rest of your life. She might just need to know she is still loved.

 

[oside]

Sorry brother no advice here, just empathy!

 

[EO80]

If she is anything like the women I have dealt with in my life it will just set her off to know that you spent the last bit of money you have on something as frivolous as a massage or flowers. If its down to this I suggest the following. Clean the house top to bottom. Make her dinner. Write a love letter and hide it under her pillow. The last one I have done and it will make her cry but in a good way. This gives her something to come back to when she is feeling down. Leave horribly corny notes around the house. Leave a message on the bathroom mirror for when she fogs it up. Little things like that go a lot farther than us as guys can ever possibly know.
Fyi guys, these things work if you are just trying to get lucky too! Lol.

 

[TraderCigarCo.]

Get her a manicure/pedicure on a Friday and pamper the shit out of her for the rest of the weekend. Rent a movie, popcorn, run her a bath, talk to her about what might be making her nervous about being pregnant, make it all about her. Remind her how beautiful she is to you and that you are looking forward to being a father and a husband with her. That always relaxed my wife.


P.S. Good luck, pregnant women are fragile and volatile.

Bro! All of this. haha. Speak her love language. If her love language is Acts of Service and you are spending your last $40 on something nice for her, then that's not going to go near as far as actually doing something like cleaning up for her and pampering her. I forget this so very often it's a wonder my wife is still with me. Speak her language and you should be all good. And above all, remember, this is only a season!! It will end.

GOOD LUCK!

 

[Mr.Draned]

Hearing all this good advice is really helpful. Sometimes it's easy to get caught up and not take that step back and think objectively. Good thing I have you guys to help out with that.
Thanks!

 

[acc05R1]

If you haven't picked up on the theme yet, you don't have to spend a dime. Just doing the little things for her shows that you appreciate her, and women are always grateful when we decide to help around the house. Clean, cook, laundry. All the things that she normally does, but silently despises, will be welcomed and appreciated (besides, you might as well get used to it anyways ). If you're feeling creative and already know her tastes and the sex of the baby, go ahead and paint/decorate the nursery for her. Anything that will show her that you're thinking of her and the baby will score points. If you want to spend a little, make her a nice dinner and rent a couple of her favorite movies. Then set up something for her and a girlfriend to go do the following day. This will be your opportunity to clean the house and start preparing the nursery. It will get better in time. Hang in there!

 

[Mathen]

I remember the first time my wife was pregnant. It happened pretty quickly after we got married, so I was totally still in the honeymoon phase and all of a sudden this woman that I loved and who adored me did a 180 and was a raging bitch!

I remember thinking "once she's out of the fist trimester and she's not feeling sick all the time, it'll get better."

I was wrong.

It goes downhill all the way until the kid is born.

I waited almost 7 years before she could talk me into going through THAT again. Then we knocked out two back to back and had them tie her tubes while she was still on the table for the C-section.

The point is--as has been said-- you could win the lottery today and she'd be pissed that the big check they hand you doesn't fit in the car. There is nothing that's going to change that. You can make things worse for yourself by being a dick, but you can only make them better to a certain extent by bending over backwards and being as helpful and understanding as possible.

No matter what you do, your wife isn't really your wife right now. She's an uncomfortable, irritable, tired host for that baby.

 

[mikeman84]

I was pretty lucky with both my boys, my wife didnt get to grumpy till the last month or so. I found that just being there for her and going on her late nite craving runs an doing more around the house helped calm her down. But there were plenty of times no matter what you say or do it will never be correct. Once you child is here you will realise is was worth going through all that once you hold them for the first time. Congrats brother an good luck