Let's Talk, BOTL and mental health
- Thread starter bdc30
- Start date
HillbillyPyro
that's what she said
Has my vote for sure!
3/5King
Shwing!
My job is driving me crazy, does that count? Lol. But really, this new job (3rd shift) is enough to make a man insane. Communication would be better between two people between cans and string than the face to face BS I've got floating around over here.
I've decided to ride it out and calm myself with positive thoughts and a humble mental approach to the fact that I'm working at all. Stay positive and good things will come of it.. (Now keep repeating until it becomes the truth...)
Thanks for the bump JM. Time to sleep #gottalovethegraveyardshift
I've decided to ride it out and calm myself with positive thoughts and a humble mental approach to the fact that I'm working at all. Stay positive and good things will come of it.. (Now keep repeating until it becomes the truth...)
Thanks for the bump JM. Time to sleep #gottalovethegraveyardshift
Fuck the god damn Airforce and this piece of shit base and people who make promises and then change it willy nilly and don't tell you and fuck up all your shit.
Finish strong! Ya fuck that. In fucking done. All fucks formerly given are now revoked.
Finish strong! Ya fuck that. In fucking done. All fucks formerly given are now revoked.
cgraunke
BoM March '14
I can tell you about the $20,000 school loan repayment that was promised me while signing up that somehow "didn't show up in my contract" after I finished basic and wanted to start collecting on it... sounds like your anger level may be even higher than mine was though!
Can you guys where my level of trust lies with military "promises"?
What's going on buddy?
I've been getting the dick since Day fucking one. Signed up guaranteed aerial gunner. Recruiter told me if I went open general I was Guaranteed the same job. Nopeeee I'm a fucking chef / basketball hander outer. Then I got sent to a missile base. (We have the highest suicide rate of all USAF bases. And it's for a reason) I got busted from e3 to e1 a month in. For UAD. They wanted to make an example... So whatever. I do my grind and go back up. It took me five fucking years to make e4. Keep in mind those are give away ranks that should only have taken three. But through fuckery it took five. Thanks colonel strong! So then after two years in the missile field busting my god damn ass in the shittiest job (awful leadership, no top cover, You are everyone's bitch and at the mercy of your NCOIC. Who most likely doesn't give a flying fuck) I get e-4. Sweet. Finally back on track. Get a test date for staff. Sweet. Let's fix this shit. NOPE. You've been selected for the QFRB.
Commander himself tells me to get ready to get out. So I do. I try to get out on my own under VSP and then this week they cancel the program and I'm basically stuck in limbo waiting for a board decision now.
but wait that's not all!!!!
My wife was told that she wouldn't have to go the missile field until after I separated. Keep in mind brand new baby in the house. So that way I wouldn't have to be without a spouse and have to leave my kid in daycare for 12 hours at a time. And of course pay out the ass for substandard care.
Well no. APPARENTLY. Two months ago they decided her date to go to the field was April first. And FORGOT to tell us.
And guess who can't get daycare in time now. And has to hope that like eight people drop off a waiting list.
God fucking damn.
And to top it off good ole buddy dom decides bullets go in your face today. Thanks for that selfish move.fuckity fuckin fuck.
3/5King
Shwing!
Hey man, it's all good. Vent until your FACE is blue. You are doing a job most won't so that the rest of America can live "free and safe" I appreciate it more than you know. I've heard a lot of horror stories from friends. It's bullshit brother and for that I am sorry and for the way the system works, I am ashamed. You guys need to be treated like knights, not tossed around in the dirt like peseants. I will keep you and the family in my prayers.
HillbillyPyro
that's what she said
This is definitely a great place to vent. Aside from all the horsing around and all bull shitting that goes on around here. The guys take serious things seriously and there's a lot of great brothers here ready and willing to help where and when needed.
Hey everyone,
First just wanted to say a very big thankyou for this thread. I always read it and my heart goes out to you all during the bad times. Anyway today shit hit the fan for me. Jan 1stmy fiancé and I separated. (Happy new year!! Great start!!) because we had some problems blah blah blah. It was not over, we both talked a lot about trying to make it work and even during that separation remained really good friends. We also have a beautiful 19 month old son so that keep us close. Straight after the separation I really need some time to comprehend everything, workout where my head was and all that, but being the bone headed male that I am, I really struggled to explain and tell her that and hence I didn't. She said she spent the first month trying to fix our relationship and couldn't handle me pushing her away. Im sure I was because I needed space but for whatever reason couldn't tell her that at the time. Anyway after that first month I really started trying and I thought things where going well enough. We got along great, had a few great laughs, I always dropped everything to go and help out with whatever she needed at the time. Today I snooped through her phone and found something very interesting. I never thought I would be the type of guy to do that but something just didn't feel right and it was absolutely killing me. She has meet someone new. In the 65 days we have been apart she has... Tried to rebuild our relationship, giving up, gotten over me, ignore all my attempts to rebuild our relationship, meet someone new, started a relationship with him, fell in love with him (apparently or so the messages say...) Her response to all that when I asked was 'What did you expect? you keep pushing me away" then our long chat ended with her saying that all she wanted was the old me back and to come home. But after that talk she know says she needs a week and half to work out what she wants, which I assusme is to choose between me or this new bloke. Anyway that's my day.
A little back story to why im writing this, 6 months ago I was made redundant from the restaurant I was working in (Im a Chef). I then took 6 months off to be a stay at home dad for my little boy. It was so amazing, I cant recommend new dads doing that if you have in a postion too. From that point I started on a downward spiral. I love my son and my fiancé but without working it really took its toll on me. I became very unmotivated and quite depressed. This only fuelled the problems. She did try to help but I wouldn't let her. I would just get angry and defensive if anyone tried to help. I have spent the past 2 months looking for work but to no avail. I have been very picky because I need a job that suits and works around when I have my son. (Thurs-Sun every week) Very hard to avoid when your a chef. Anyway I have decided to fast forward my long term plans of moving into Real Estate and do it now. Its really positive because Im moving out of the dark place and getting back to being a contributing member of society.
This day has really taken its toll on me and I felt like I was just sliding back to that black, blankness that seems to devour you so im writing this to try get some of it out. I really appreciate this thread being made available as it can be so much easier to share your inner thoughts and emotions with complete strangers than it can with your own family.
Much love and my deepest thanks and gratitude to you all, I just hope one day that you realise what a help this has been to me personally.
PS sorry if it is a completely illiterate and just a big rabble.
Adam
First just wanted to say a very big thankyou for this thread. I always read it and my heart goes out to you all during the bad times. Anyway today shit hit the fan for me. Jan 1stmy fiancé and I separated. (Happy new year!! Great start!!) because we had some problems blah blah blah. It was not over, we both talked a lot about trying to make it work and even during that separation remained really good friends. We also have a beautiful 19 month old son so that keep us close. Straight after the separation I really need some time to comprehend everything, workout where my head was and all that, but being the bone headed male that I am, I really struggled to explain and tell her that and hence I didn't. She said she spent the first month trying to fix our relationship and couldn't handle me pushing her away. Im sure I was because I needed space but for whatever reason couldn't tell her that at the time. Anyway after that first month I really started trying and I thought things where going well enough. We got along great, had a few great laughs, I always dropped everything to go and help out with whatever she needed at the time. Today I snooped through her phone and found something very interesting. I never thought I would be the type of guy to do that but something just didn't feel right and it was absolutely killing me. She has meet someone new. In the 65 days we have been apart she has... Tried to rebuild our relationship, giving up, gotten over me, ignore all my attempts to rebuild our relationship, meet someone new, started a relationship with him, fell in love with him (apparently or so the messages say...) Her response to all that when I asked was 'What did you expect? you keep pushing me away" then our long chat ended with her saying that all she wanted was the old me back and to come home. But after that talk she know says she needs a week and half to work out what she wants, which I assusme is to choose between me or this new bloke. Anyway that's my day.
A little back story to why im writing this, 6 months ago I was made redundant from the restaurant I was working in (Im a Chef). I then took 6 months off to be a stay at home dad for my little boy. It was so amazing, I cant recommend new dads doing that if you have in a postion too. From that point I started on a downward spiral. I love my son and my fiancé but without working it really took its toll on me. I became very unmotivated and quite depressed. This only fuelled the problems. She did try to help but I wouldn't let her. I would just get angry and defensive if anyone tried to help. I have spent the past 2 months looking for work but to no avail. I have been very picky because I need a job that suits and works around when I have my son. (Thurs-Sun every week) Very hard to avoid when your a chef. Anyway I have decided to fast forward my long term plans of moving into Real Estate and do it now. Its really positive because Im moving out of the dark place and getting back to being a contributing member of society.
This day has really taken its toll on me and I felt like I was just sliding back to that black, blankness that seems to devour you so im writing this to try get some of it out. I really appreciate this thread being made available as it can be so much easier to share your inner thoughts and emotions with complete strangers than it can with your own family.
Much love and my deepest thanks and gratitude to you all, I just hope one day that you realise what a help this has been to me personally.
PS sorry if it is a completely illiterate and just a big rabble.
Adam
Adam. I don't have much to offer as advice. My wife and I have been separated before. And she and I met someone both in the meantime. I pushed her away like crazy and when I finally realized I was being a jackass she had moved on. I fought like hell to get her back. And now we are happily married. Don't give up the fight if that's what you want brother. It can be easy to get discouraged. But if she is your one. Don't give up. And couples counseling can always help. If you ever need someone just to bitch to. Feel free to PM me and I'll toss you my number. And know that the brotherhood is here for you
Hoshneer
Drew Estate NotRex
Sorry to hear this man. It sounds like a tough situation but H3rrington is right if she is the one you gotta fight. I can't offer much advice either but we are here for you if you ever need to talk.
Amen Brother! I'm right there with you! My wife and I were married and divorced and then remarried! We went through alot but if God joined 2 people together there is no one that can separate them!
Adam, very sorry to hear brother. As other stated I am also here if you need to talk. My only advice and take it for what ever lol is make sure you show no resentment toward her during this week and a half time period and also make sure she knows that you know why you split. If you ever need to talk I like many others are here